This week's column is going to have name changes to protect identities. I haven't ever had the opportunity to pick pseudonyms before, so I am going to have a bit of fun with this.
Recently my friend Bono posed a question to my friend Lara and me. She wanted to know what we would do if given the opportunity to be men for one day. Would we even take the opportunity? \Of course"", we both said. ""Think of the possibilities!"" My mind was whirring. What would I do given just a day?
Well, I said that I would put on a suit and go interact with people. Maybe take some female friends to a restaurant. Maybe get the oil in my car changed. Maybe find a conversation or two to jump into with my newfound ""authoritative male voice."" Then, at night, I would go somewhere all alone, maybe to see a band in a club. I would stay out late and take a long walk home...
Bono and Lara interrupted with their laughter. ""I'd have sex!"" one of them said. ""Yeah, me too!"" said the other. Perhaps I am as much of a prude as people always say I am, but I am much more curious to feel male privilege than male pleasure.
After much teasing and bickering, I gave up and said that I wouldn't go out looking for sex, but if the opportunity came up, I would have sex as a man. But what an incredible waste of a day! I would much rather know if it feels different to be looked in the eye when you are a man.
This reminds me of another conversation I had with a different friend, Moses Brown. Moses and I share an office. While talking one day, it came up that I close the office door if I am there on the weekends. Normally, our office is open while we are there, and since there are ten people in ten cubicles, the door is almost always open. But, I close the door if I am there alone on the weekends.
""Yeah,"" said Moses, ""why do you do that?""
""Because I don't know whose here on the weekends. There aren't as many people around, so it is a little bit creepier when you hear footsteps in the hall. I close the door at night, too.""
""Huh. I don't close the door when I am here alone,"" Moses said.
""Well, Moses, despite being taller than you by at least half an inch, I am still a girl, and you are still a boy.""
Moses admitted that, even though he knew about it, he always forgot about his male perspective. We talked about places on campus that we would walk and paths that we would take home. We talked about stranger rape, and how it is not that common, but about how women (remember that I am not speaking for every woman here!) still think about it.
Moses thought that it was a good for him to have these conversations with women every so often, just as a reminder about the difference in the way we experience public spaces. But, this difference in perspective isn't just between men and women. It is also divided along lines of race, class, religion, and sexual orientation.
When my friends asked me if I would be a man for a day, I agreed because I wanted to experience male privilege. I would really be experiencing white male privilege. It would be a very different experience walking down State Street if I just changed a couple of the variables.
