Chalk. The multicolored set of utensils used to liven up streets occupied by little children. That or else to annoy the bejesus out of every person that happens to look down as they walk on any sidewalk on this campus.
We are living in a world where I can talk to my mother in Minnesota, my grandmother in Milwaukee, my other grandmother in Vietnam and my friend in England at the same time. If I push a certain set of buttons on an instrument that weighs a few ounces, I can instantly connect to someone in a cave in Australia. E-mail, cell phones, IM'you name it, communication has never been easier or more effective.
So why can't I walk down one friggin' street on this campus without being told that I should vote for Jim Doyle because the chalk tells me, \He rules.""? Why should I join an organization because the writing's on the floor? If you're running late to work, or a class, are you seriously going to stop by the purple writing in the sidewalk and say, ""Well, I guess I really should join the UW Tae-Kwon-Do Club.""
Some people believe chalk is not confined solely to the ground. Memorial Library's columns are strewn with poignant and pensive messages like, ""Peace is love man"" and ""The Arabs are not our enemies."" And I agree, the Arabs are not our enemies'people with chalk are.
I get the strange feeling that the same people who like chalk as a medium are those who actually bought stuff from the Todd Oldham dorm collection with the multi-colored lamps and pillows with the word ""glam"" on them. That way, they can be creative and cool while they watch their DVD collector's edition of ""Crossroads"" and listen to their Pink CD, because she's pop... with an edge!
The worst ones aren't even the promos for organizations. The worst ones are the chalk messages made by people on this campus who think it's a really good idea to inform the public that ""JAIME IS THE NEW MEMBER OF BETA IOTA TAU!!!!!"" Or that ""TODAY IS FAWN'S 19TH BIRTHDAY, YAAAY!!"" Maybe if I knew Fawn or Jaime, I'd be happy for them, but since I don't, it's just another aberration on the cement.
Maybe, I'm just jealous. Maybe I wished that when I got this column last year that the staff would write in big letters that, ""WE WELCOME JONESY AS A NEW FEATURES COLUMNIST FOR THE DAILY CARDINAL!!!!!"" Or that my friends would celebrate my birthday with big chalk letters. Because isn't that what everyone's dream is? To have a minor accomplishment heralded in big orange letters on the corner of Johnson and Lake? I think that if I ever asked my friends to do that for me, they are legally obliged to kick my ass.
So if you want me to join your group, tell me that Jenna joined a sorority or that I should base my political ideologies on the use of fuchsia, please just write me a letter.
mikejones@dailycardinal.com.
