It is a force that we cannot control--instead, it controls us. It controls what we wear, what we do and it infiltrates our conversation. Some call it an evil and others see it as a blessing, but whatever the opinion, one fact remains true: It cannot be stopped. It is the weather.
Unless you live in a cave for the duration of the winter, you would know that it snowed on Monday. That's not a big deal, right?
Apparently it IS a big deal. One of the city papers displayed the headline, \1.3 inches of chaos"" on its local page. At the top. In a big font. I didn't read the article about the supposed ""chaos,"" mostly because I couldn't see how the writer could turn 1.3 inches of snow into an overly dramatized news event. Although it would be fun to try.
One point three inches of snow, aided by the dominating force of gravity, pelted the streets of Madison Monday morning. The townspeople covered themselves with protective woolen gear out of fear of the mysterious things that seemed to be just falling from the sky. Small children started using the snow to form spherical weapons to attack each other with. Adults began violently wielding large metal spades right outside their homes. At the end of the day, the people of Madison went to sleep with a renewed calmness. But lurking in the back of their minds was the threat of more snow, and more chaos.
Sometimes I just don't understand the obsession with the weather. It snowed. It got colder. It's December in Wisconsin. These things happen.
But I'll admit that when I woke up before the sun rose on Monday morning, I smiled like a giddy first-grader when I realized my sleepy eyes weren't deceiving me and the first substantial snowfall of the year was upon us. I marveled at the beautiful white flakes that were yet to be tainted by cars and plows.
Then, throughout the day I probably said in conversation no less than eight times, ""Man, it's cold out today."" I'm not sure why. I don't really have a good excuse. Obviously, whomever I was talking to also knew that it was cold out, so why did I need to tell them? Maybe I was trying to form a personal connection of some sort. My friend and I could bond over the fact that we both agreed that it was chilly. The weather: bringing people together since the dawn of time.
Or maybe I was attempting to fill a conversational void. I could blame it on time constraints. Talking to someone in passing isn't the best time to bring up the story of how my brother broke his nose. So I resort to the weather. But why? The weather? Do I really have nothing better to talk about?
I'm not a conversational elitist, either. Some of the best conversations are about idiotic crap. But it seems like everyone talks about the weather all the time, and I'm getting sick of it.
So I implore you to regain control of your conversational habits. Wax poetic about world peace. Debate over which is better: Pac-Man, or Ms. Pac-Man. Gossip about the latest movie star to enter rehab. Complain about how cold it is outside ... Ah crap. I quit.
