Being the type of person who likes to benefit mankind through my own observations, and also as a way to satisfy the public service aspect of my plea bargain with the state of Wisconsin over the charge that I sold cigarrettes to middle-school kids on 27 non-consecutive occasions, I present to you The Long and the Short of It Mini-Guide to Apartments, Houses and Leases.
My roommates and I received our renewal notice a week ago. So far we've enjoyed our apartment and lack of any major problems, but barely three months after moving into the place, we already have to make a decision on where we're living eight months from now.
With such a state of affairs applying to UW-Madison students during the time that really belongs to midterms and finals, it's never too early to give significant thought to your living options.
So what do you do? Grab a bottle of whiskey and hope your parents figure it out? No! Get together with people you think you want to look at every morning for a year and go hunting for the abode that will best suit your collective needs. Save the whiskey for your lease-signing celebration, or donate it to the Needy College Columnist Fund, headquartered in my bedroom.
First things first: Organize a group of people you're interested in living with and who are interested in living with you. This can be hard, but it is imperative your group tactfully expel any people that really want to live with you, but who you'd rather not live with. An uncomfortable five-minute explanation and a few weeks of hurt feelings are more desirable than an entire year of cohabitation hell.
Next, start searching for a prospective residence. Really put some thought into what kind of environment in which you want to conduct your student life. What will work best: A party- or study-conducive environment? Upper or lower campus? Apartment or house? Lite or genuine-draft?
After you've zeroed in on some concrete choices, it's time to preview your options. Landlords will be more than happy to show you around their available units, and it is up to you to stay sharp and observe any potential issues unique to each residence, however minute they may be initially-it is truly the small things that matter in the end.
Take my place for example. Our apartment is fantastically accommodating to the needs of four handsome bachelors in almost every way, and we noticed this the first time we took a tour. With that said, we failed to notice, or even query, the damningly paper-thin ceiling that separates us from the upstairs apartments in our two-story complex.
Not that it's the biggest issue in the world, nor is it in any way the fault of our neighbors, but it seems like every time someone up there takes too heavy a step, the noise reverberates down to us and sounds like the roof is caving in or the keg-delivery guy is really clumsy.
This can be incredibly annoying, especially at 2:15 on a Wednesday morning, and illustrates the importance of studying the quirks of any place you might lease.
I wish you the best of luck in your housing quests this year. I've already got my arrangements for next year, giving me ample time to profit off the nicotine addictions of our nation's 13- and 14-year-olds.
Those suckers will pay 15 bucks a pack.
writePNL@yahoo.com.
