You and your girlfriend have been asked to stay indoors: Shakira, \Whenever, Wherever.""
You're in not-quite-unconditional love: Meatloaf, ""I Would Do Anything For Love.""
You're an indie rocker: Beat Happening, ""I Dig You.""
You're not sure what to do with an indie rocker: Dead Kennedies ""Punk Rock Girl.""
You're about to be dumped by an indie rocker: Justin Timberlake, ""Seorita.""
You're dating oft-injured quarterback Jim Sorgi: Curtis Blow, ""These Are the Breaks.""
You're an adolescent in love: Violent Femmes, ""Add it Up.""
You're in a long-distance relationship: Madonna, ""Like a Prayer.""
You're dating Liz Phair (pre-sellout): Liz Phair, ""Polyester Bride.""
You're dating Liz Phair (post-sellout): Guns 'n' Roses, ""I used to Love Her [but I had to kill her].""
You're going on the first date (swing): Ella Fitzgerald, ""Paper Moon.""
For the morning after (swing): Louis Jordan, ""Is You Is or Is You Ain't my Baby?""
You're going on your first date ('80s hair rock): Def Leopard, ""Pour Some Sugar on Me.""
For the morning after ('80s Hair Rock): AC/DC, ""Shook Me All Night Long.""
You're going on your First Date (Queen): Queen, ""Somebody to love.""
For the morning after (Queen): Queen, ""We are the Champions.""
You're in love from afar: Radiohead, ""Creep.""
You're an 'Uptown Girl': Billy Joel, ""Uptown Girl.""
You're girlfriend is the 'Uptown Girl:' Billy Idol, ""Rebel Yell.""
You have an Oedipus complex: Boys II Men, ""A Song For Momma.""
You've been stalking her: Blondie, ""One Way or Another.""
You've been stalking her since Halloween: Screamin' Jay Hawkins, ""I Put a Spell on You.""
You've been stalking her since the '80s: The Police, ""Every Breath You Take.""
You were dumped ('90s alternative): Ben Folds Five, ""Song For the Dumped.""
You were dumped (swing): Louis Armstrong, ""Don't Get Around Much Anymore.""
You were dumped (Canadian): Alannis Morrisette, ""You Oughta Know.""
You were dumped (Bel Bib Devoe): Bel Bib Devoe, ""That Girl is Poison.""
You're the bigot getting married: Billy Idol,""White Wedding.""
You're a lonely male: Weezer, ""El Scorcho.""
You're a lonely female: Cyndi Lauper, ""She Bop.""
You're a lonely male in engineering fraternity: En Vogue, ""Never Gonna Get it..""
You're a hopeless romantic: Chris Isaac, ""Wicked Game.""
You're just plain hopeless: Nine Inch Nails, ""Closer.\
