Three weeks ago my computer broke. I hit the \on"" switch one morning, and instead of going beep, whir, click, click, beep, it just went beep, whir, click, and nothing came up on the monitor. I called DoIT.
""What seems to be the problem?"" the techie asked.
I imitated the abbreviated start-up sequence.
""The background usually pops up after the second beep,"" I said. ""Then the little orchestra music goes, 'doon doon doon doon DOON,' you know? But it's not doing any of that.""
""How old is your computer?"" he asked. When I told him six years he failed to stifle a laugh.
""OK,"" he said. ""Well, we can try to figure out what's wrong with it. That's $62 an hour with a one-hour minimum. For the actual repair we'd give you an hour's estimate. Or we can just try and recover your data. That's still $62 an hour, but there's a two-hour minimum charge, with no guarantee of recovery. I have to tell you, with the computer you have, you're lucky it's lasted this long.""
Apparently I'd been typing on borrowed time. I thought computers were like child laborers, and you could get at least eight years of good work before they broke down.
""Alright,"" I said. ""Let's just do the data recovery, then.""
I am extremely dependent on having a computer at home. I check my e-mail perhaps 15 times a day. I don't write well longhand, and to get any work done, I need more quiet than a campus lab provides.
I called my brother the physicist to get computer recommendations. He suggested a Mac. My experience in Journalism 202, however, cemented my hatred for all things Macintosh. Granted, the semester-long frustration was due partly to assignments such as writing mock press releases for Lockheed-Martin and interpreting market research on Halloween Oreos. (""Parents with children age 12 or younger are more receptive to the seasonal orange filling. Seniors living on a fixed budget seem to desire smaller packages of cookies."") But I also hate Mac's stupid miniature keyboards.
DoIT succeeded in recovering my files, and I decided to get a Dell. The only reason I picked Dell was so when I told people of my computer woes I could finish by saying, ""Dude, I'm getting a Dell.""
I was feeling pretty good until I saw a small campus protest last week. Students were holding a banner reading, ""Dude, Take Back My Dell."" Below that was the address, http://www.toxicdude.com.
I visited the site. It's a nationwide campaign calling for a better system of recycling old computers, and demanding electronics companies phase out the use of hazardous materials such as lead and mercury. According to the site, the high turnover rate of electronics in America means millions of computers each year find their way to landfills and incinerators, and the toxins end up in rain, air, soil, and groundwater.
I didn't know computers contained such toxic substances. Had I been aware of this, I would not have honored my faithful computer with a belated burial at sea. Unfortunately, the recent heat wave has drastically thinned the ice at Lake Mendota's middle, and the matter is out of my hands.
Louie is a senior majoring in journalism. He can be reached at chunkkick@hotmail.com. His column runs every Monday.
