The Badger football team is off to a 4-0 start and all is well here in the land of Bucky. Students are really starting to get excited about Barry Alvarez's latest installment, as witnessed by the signs reading \Football Voucher for Sale ... UW v. Northwestern ... $75.00 obo!!!!!"" (A brief aside to all of you heartless scalpers asking for more than $30 for Northwestern tickets: IT'S NORTHWESTERN!!!!!! Am I the only one who remembers the NU game from last year? And by the way, since when did selling vouchers become an alternative way to pay for tuition?)
But let's go back to the Badgers. How about that defense? Last year, the Olsen twins could have rushed for 100 yards on this defense. Now, thanks to new defensive coordinator Bret Bielema, they've become a head-hunting, bone-crushing terror squad that makes the unit from a year ago look like a swing choir.
Just look at what they did against Penn State last weekend. The defensive line crashed through the Nittany Lions' offensive line like a hurricane through Florida. Erasmus James did so much damage to the PSU quarterback depth chart that Joe Pa had to call George W. Bush to ask for federal relief.
And yet as well as the defense has played, let's not get drunk on the Badger Kool-Aid quite yet. One need only look to the 2002 season, when the Badgers got off to a 5-0 start, only to crash down to earth faster than that NASA satellite that crashed into the desert last month and finish 8-6.
You're probably saying, ""But Joe, you're so cynical. Just look at defense. It's only allowed one touchdown all season."" Good point, I'll admit- it's easier for a mechanical engineering major to get a date with a sorority girl than it has been for an opponent to score on the Badgers.
But there's a reason for this, and it isn't just because of Bielema's revival. No, the real reason is because the Badgers' first four opponents aren't exactly BCS contenders. For that matter, they aren't even Humanitarian Bowl contenders. They are, as we say in the business, cupcakes.
Cupcakes, first off, are not Atkins approved. So, if Barry wants to maintain that svelte figure, he should probably start cutting back. Secondly, they don't exactly provide us with the best barometer of a team's true ability. The overall record of Wisconsin's four opponents is 3-12, which, to be subtle, stinks.
The Badgers' good start is certainly a good start, and I hope it's legit, but I'm holding my judgment until they beat somebody with a winning record.
So tomorrow, when some shill tries to sell you a Northwestern ticket for $70, say, ""No thanks, I'm counting my carbs right now, and that is just way too much to pay for another cupcake.""
--J-oe can be reached for comment via email at jphasler@wisc.edu.
