Do you know how sad it is
To be a Christmas tree?
Especially if you're an atheist!
My tale of irony...
My life had been breeze
Quite literally
We'd rumble about politics
And shake out philosophy
Then we heard them coming
They marched hard, quickly.
Bulky ones with heavy coats
A brainwashed army!
As the family approached
I thought I spotted an axe
So I rustled to them sweetly
\Drop the weapon and relax!""
But they wouldn't listen
No they wouldn't dare
I'd have to defend myself
From humans who didn't care.
Despite my piney efforts
Of much pricking and sticking
That family dragged me home
I was the one of their picking.
They pulled me and tugged me
As they sang of salvation
And loaded me into an SUV
Their most divine creation!
Thou shalt not covet.
And thou shalt not kill.
Well now I'm pretty dead,
So what's the appeal?
They tossed me upright.
Never bothered to ask
If I would feel comfortable
Being covered in Catholic trash.
Oh family of four
How else can I say...
When you're thinking of heaven
You're wasting today!
Your talk of the next life
Shows you're consumed by fear
And if you're not into idolatry
What am I doing here?
And what is this ornament?
How much did you pay?
If you were really about charity
You'd give it away!
Your mass is ridiculous
You sound hypnotized
How many pedophile clergy
Before you finally realize?
To me it's quite clear
That you forfeit control
Keeping to silly rules
That won't save your soul
I know that it's hard
To trust a glowing tree
But you've got a burning bush
So why not listen to me?
My parents weren't married
And I'm proud to be gay
What else can I do
To make you throw me away?
But now I look like a fool
All shiny and plastic
I'm exactly what they wanted
The changes were drastic
As the days roll by
My needles will fall
In exchange for their hope
Of having it all
My tale will end
When they toss me out
Disposable happiness
What life's all about!