Dear (insert name/epithet),
I can't believe it's only been (insert time period) since you entered my life and turned it into an exhilarating and (joyous/agonizing) emotional rollercoaster. Perhaps it's true; time really does lose meaning when your heart is (aflutter/broken). So now, as Valentine's Day nears, it's inevitable that my thoughts turn to you and the way you have become the sole possessor of my (affection/last shred of dignity).
How could you do this to me? How is it that you have managed to turn my whole world upside-down? Just a few short (insert units of time) ago, I was a (lonely, incomplete/happy, content) (man/woman). And now, look at me-a (blessed/cursed) soul, swept up in your (intoxicating grace, beauty, and kindness/fiery path of chaos and destruction).
If only the whole world could see the extraordinary magnitude of your (soul/emptiness). There is so much more to you than meets the eye. How could I have known when I first laid eyes on you that you would become my (guiding light/baggage)? You are proof that a book can't be judged by its cover. And after getting to know you, to me you are like poetry: (elegant and sensitive/pretentious, confusing and a colossal waste of time).
Our relationship has been so intense that I can't help but think of my future and how you might fit into it. The way you have cultivated our relationship makes me naturally picture you (raising/eating) our young. It's funny how you have changed my outlook. I knew from the first time we kissed that (we would last together/your mouth had been some pretty ugly places). And if I find myself lying next to you 10 years from now, I hope it (still feels like this/is because we accidentally bought neighboring burial plots).
But as Valentine's Day crawls achingly close, it is not just a time to reflect on long-term futures. It is a time to live and rejoice in the present day. And when I think of the feelings you arouse in me, all I can think of is Valentine's Night. Can you see it as clearly as I can? Sitting (with you/alone), opening a bottle of (wine/whiskey). And then, as the Hallmark day folds into the inevitable grey of the cold February night, I will find warmth and tenderness, making love to (you/someone you know).
It's amazing we ever found romance at all. With the posturing of bars, parties and social cliques, and the shields of superficiality and non-commitment, it's nearly impossible to find real intimacy in this town. And through it all, whether we admit it or not, we are all really yearning for something more meaningful, something of substance. But you and I beat the odds, and now I understand that all those barriers were just (silly insecurity and denial/self-defense from people like you).
If only I had more than words. If only I could give you a full sense of what this is like for me. If only you would soon feel the burning of (my passionate love for you/Chlamydia), then darlin', I could die happy. But for Valentine's Day, I just wanted to give you this letter and let you know how much I (love/regret) the way you have parted the curtains of my heart and stepped onto the center stage of my life.
(Love/Sincerely),
(insert your name)
Amos'column runs every Thursday in The Daily Cardinal. You can send him your (love/hate) letters at AmosAP@hotmail.com
