When is your exact birthday, Mr. Smith?\
""October 3, 1982."" (Keep looking him in the eye, there's nothing he can do, show no fear, you have nothing to hide...)
""Okay, Mr. Smith, what is your sign?""
""Libra,"" (Ha! Can't fool me!)
""Alright, I'm taking this,"" the cop says with an annoyed look on his face.
""Why?"" you say, in utter disbelief.
""Your beautiful brown eyes seem to be blue tonight.""
Clearly, there are some things that just cannot be memorized. It seems that in Madison, fake IDs are as common as student IDs, bus passes or even real driver's licenses. Many students on campus either know where they can find a good one at a cheap rate, or have their brother's-girlfriend's-cousin's ID lined up, waiting for them.
Even though it's no surprise fake IDs are common in a college town, the penalties associated with them are. As of last week the penalties for all offenses rose, with fines up to $424, enough to put a dent in anyone's bank account.
Mike Hanson, public information officer for the Madison Police Department said fake IDs in Madison have been a part of the weekend scene for as long as he can remember.
""For years and years it has been an ongoing problem in Madison downtown bars because of the drinking climate that surrounds the area,"" he said.
Ask most any student, and he or she can tell you that some bars are more prone to accepting fake IDs than others. A student from another school visiting Madison recalled that he had his ID taken at Memorial Union.
""I was misinformed of where I could use a fake ID, when I told people of where I went they said, ‘Ohhh, why'd you go to the Union?'""
Memorial Union and the Kollege Klub, 529 N. Lake St., among others, have become notorious when it comes to taking fake IDs. This could be due to the random ""stings"" that police perform on bars in the area, and the consequences that come with receiving violations.
""We do perform stings in the downtown bars and we do a number of bar checks as well ... there's no set time for stings, it could happen three times a week, or once a month, it all depends on resources available for downtown offices and community police,"" Hanson said.
When targeting people to question, Hanson added, ""I think the misconception is well, [police] just go and blanket the bars for IDs ... we don't. We're astute enough to know who probably looks 19 or 18 and then ask them for their ID. And if they're 21—great, you know, we give them their ID back and say have a nice night.""
A UW-Madison student who did not want to be identified, recalled the night her ID was taken.
""I had gone to a bar, and I had gotten in the bar just fine, this was a college bar, and I had gone to get our jackets from the car, and when I came back, another bouncer looked at my ID and told me he knew the person on the ID, my sister, and knew it wasn't me because of it,"" she said. ""He told me though, that it was a really good ID, but that he knew it wasn't me, and he wouldn't give it back to me, and he took my drink, I was kind of upset.""
Some students aren't as lucky. Hanson said the best thing to do if you are approached at a bar and are not 21 is to cooperate with the officers.
""If there is compliance, the officer has options, they can remove the person and take their ID and have them leave the bar. If an enforcement route is taken, the person's ID is still confiscated and they receive a substantial citation,"" he said.
Tim Huffman, a bouncer at Lucky's bar, said approximately two or three IDs are taken on any given weekend night. He goes by a simple rule, ""If you think it doesn't look like a person, you ask for a second form, and if they don't have one, you take the ID.""
This no non-nsense policy, common at many bars, could be due to the fact that police keep close watch of violations.
""Anytime there is an incident in a bar, that goes into what's called a tavern file and that file is presented to the ALRC which is the Alcohol License Review Committee,"" Hanson said.
If a student chooses to risk owning or using a fake, they should be prepared for the consequences that come along with carrying one. It's possible to be put in a situation similar to another anonymous UW-Madison student.
""What does the ‘M' in your middles name stand for?"" to which she replied, ""Michelle... "" The bouncer looked at her and said, ""That's interesting because your middle name starts with a J."" Another $424 later, made this student wonder, was it worth it?New costs for getting caught:
• Underage person to possess or consume alcohol beverage
on licensed premises: $361
(Second time in 12 months, $424)
• Underage person to falsely represent age for purpose of
receiving alcohol from licensee: $361
(Second time in 12 months, $424)
• Underage person intentionally carrying ID not theirs, or carrying altered or duplicated to convey false information: $424
(no second time clause)
• Underage person makes, alters or duplicates official ID card: $424
-Source: Mike Hanson, public information officer, Madison Police
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