The sad truth that we all have to cope with is that nearly 100 percent of the student body has come home after a stressful day of class to a lone note placed on the possession that your roommate for some reason has convinced themselves you will look at first that begins with the subtly accusatory ""To whom it may concern.""
""It was just one big pan and three cups!"" nearly 100 percent of the now-defensive student body collectively thinks while getting out a pen in order to even the score. The cycle can only continue into a downward spiral of pseudo-anonymous snarkiness. Until now.
Just know that you have the power to help stop the composition of the most indirect and furiously scrawled nuanced notes campus-wide! Passive-Aggressive Notes Awareness Week was started to help break the cycle of the roundabout ways that college students communicate their utter disdain of the person(s) they share quarters with. Don't go on giving backhanded insults any longer—make your absolute disgust and the imminent insanity hinging on your roommate's wash-and-dry habits authored and bold.
For this reason, attached to this column is a cut-out-able photograph of a Post-It that gets straight to the point and clearly says what you've always wanted to scream to your morbidly-couch ridden and crumb-shirted housemates, but were too passive-aggressive to consider.
Sign it with your pet's name, accidentally leave it out on the kitchen table, tape it to a dish, casually make reference to it in conversation with a strategically informed friend while in the same room as your roommate, or employ any other method you can anonymously dance around to inform the culprit!
That cereal bowl with the black, disease-harboring mold? Just watch it be poorly scrubbed and put back into the cupboard.
Happy tension!
VP is not responsible for any incidents involving Nair shampoo, leftovers eating (no matter how delicious), girlfriend banging or the like that ensue from the presentation of this note. For more Passive Aggressive Notes Awareness Week memorabilia, please email VP at evanpay@wisc.edu.
