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The Daily Cardinal Est. 1892
Thursday, February 13, 2025

APRIL FOOLS': Oh man, Justin Bieber is hot!

OMG this week has been so exciting. I got a 93 on my Geography test, my mom let me go to Steven Jacobs' Spin the Bottle party and most importantly, Justin Bieber's new album My World 2.0 came out!!! I was texting Ashley yesterday and we were fuh-REAKING out about it! Did you know his favorite color is blue? Mine too! Pretty sure we're soulmates or something. Ugh.

Anyways, without any hint of bias or prejudice or need to make out with J-Biebs for hours, I can say this is the BEST album ever released by anyone anywhere. Seriously, it's that good. :-) The first song is called ""Baby"" and it has Ludacris in it too. I like Ludacris, but this one time I was singing his song in my room and my Dad came and took the CD away and said he was talking about, like, sex and stuff. Whatever. This song might be the BEST song on the album, by far.

It's about when Justin used to have a girlfriend but then broke up with him. :-( What an IDIOT; who would break up with Justin? She was probably ugly anyways, like Tracy Feldman from my English class. The chorus features a look into Justin's soul, as he sings ""Baby, baby baby ohh / Baby, baby, baby noooo,"" as he sings for the loss of his first love. It's sooooo sad :-( Ugh.

Justin really changed up his style on ""Never Let You Go."" From the first words you can tell it's really different from ""Baby"" with the line ""Oh no, oh no, oh."" His tears are for not being able to hug his favorite girl enough times in the day, which, omg, is TOTALLY what happened to my BFFL Kelsey with her stupid ex-bf Chad. He was always playing Call of Duty and only texting her once an hour about stuff. So lame!

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""Never Let You Go"" has some serious replay value, and will definitely be bumping at everyone's awesome pool parties this summer, even that skank Tracy Feldman's, but her pool sucks. It doesn't even have a diving board or anything! Ugh.

My World 2.0 doesn't ever lose steam, not even at the end with one of my favorite tracks, ""U Smile."" It's like J-Dogg is singing to me when he croons ""You smile I smile (whoa) / You smile I smile / Hey hey hey / You smile I smile / I smile I smile / You smile I smile / Oh.""

As soon as I heard that track I texted Ashley and was like ""omg did you hear U Smile it's soooooooo good <3"" and she was like, ""totally, it's my favorite! :-)"" and then I was like ""I know! He's totes adorbes :-P"" and she was like ""You have such a huge crush on him"" and I was like ""I know! He's my dream boy!"" and then my mom called me for dinner and it was totally lame. We had meatloaf too! Ugh.

In conclusion, My World 2.0 is the greatest album ever made. If you don't agree, you can just shut up ‘cuz your jealous. Peace!

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