For the past several months, the Humanities building's exterior has been filled with young-looking skateboarders in tight, pre-ripped jeans. They are often dirty and most of them smell like a pungent mixture of lice and failure. But just who exactly are these skateboarder ""hooligans?"" I was able to catch up with the supposed leader of the group, a Madison native and high school senior named Travis Michaels.
""Look, we're 'boarders. That's it. The end, Michaels said, aggressively. If we're boarding, doing our thing and if we crash into someone then tough luck. Get out of the way, dude. We don't care who you are, if we're boarding and you're in the way you're gonna get it. That's just how it goes.""
""We're daredevils. If we're trying a trick and we wipe out and kill ourselves … then I guess that's the chance we take.""
As I was interviewing Michaels, a fellow high school 'boarder, Jason Knight, attempted a small jump with his skateboard, resulting in his falling to the sidewalk as he screamed in pain.
""Ahhhhh, did you see that? I think my legs broke, but whatever, I'm a 'boarder, so you know, I don't really feel this kind of shit too badly,"" Knight said as he pointed to what appeared to be a small scrape on his upper knee and quickly wiped away a tear.
When I asked Knight what made him feel qualified to describe himself as a ""daredevil punk,"" he pointed to faded graffiti on a nearby building wall that read ""NO ONE CARES.""
""You see that shit? I didn't write that, but I could have,"" he said as he shoved me with a gentle awkwardness only a high school kid is capable of.
""Hell, I know who wrote it but I'm not gonna tell a reporter nerd like you cause I know the cops are all over that shit."" But what does the university crowd think of these ""Daredevil 'Boarders""? I interviewed UW-Madison sophomore Sasha Lane, who seemed less than enthusiastic.
""Honestly, they're really annoying. They seem so intent on skateboarding in front of everyone but they're not very good,"" Lane said.
""All they do is skate around and try lame tricks they usually don't land. How long have they even been doing this? Did they just discover that skateboarding existed?""
Lane's comments brought up an intriguing question: Just how long ago did these daredevil psychos choose a life of danger, risk and mediocre skateboarding skill?
""Most of us have been 'boarding for a month or two now,"" said Michaels as he tried to ‘grind' on the staircase and promptly fell to the pavement.
""I'm the vet, so I've been doing this for some time. I think I first started 'boarding about a year ago, so that's why most of my tricks are so dangerous and shit,"" ""When you fall off the horse you gotta get back up,"" Michaels said sheepishly before thanking a passerby who helped him up.
""Thanks man, sorry I crashed into you, I just tried a new trick. Hope I didn't get in your way. Oh, I didn't? OK great. Well have a nice day,"" Michaels politely said to the passerby.
