On Dec. 22, 2013, I will be walking down the aisle in the Kohl Center wearing a sort of dress, shaking hands, smiling for pictures and mostly just being happy for being done. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve loved my three and a half years here at the university, but when the finish line is so close, it’s tough not to salivate at the chance to cross it.
But with the future comes uncertainty and with uncertainty comes me peeing in my pants because I’m afraid. The fears are real, people. All I can think is, “Will I get a job? Will I find somewhere to live or will I stay in my parent’s basement until I’m 33? Should I just go to graduate school because it seems easier, and all I want to do is continue my learning experience while failing to grow up?” (By the way, I already know the answer to the last question is a resounding “no.”)
But that’s for future me to worry about right? I mean, at this time it’s very awkward applying to companies (or in my case, music labels) for two reasons: They either have positions open now (meaning Oct. 30) and want you in the next week, or they don’t have any jobs available but they’ll keep your resume “on file.” It might make more sense just to wait until I’ve graduated and have relinquished the responsibilities of being a student. Or it probably makes more sense just to send a thousand more resumes to everyone in the world with the subject header: please hire me, please, please, please, or, my name is Michael, please. Yeah... that’ll get me hired.
But there’s still so much on this campus and in Madison that I haven’t experienced. Why rush out of here? I’ve walked by the Chazen Museum three times a day for three years, and I’ve never even been inside. I haven’t walked on the Lakeshore path since my first week of freshman year. I still don’t know what’s inside the Historical Society or Science Hall or North Hall or basically any building other than like five. And I’ve never had sex in the stacks of Memorial Library, which Badger Herald Shoutout boast as something happening to everyone, all the time.
But considering the many things I haven’t done, I have still experienced so much on campus. I got to see our football team upset the number one team in the nation. I got to experience real Mifflin and real Freakfest before they turned into hilarious excuses for the Madison Police Department and University of Wisconsin to show power over their residents and students. I also took classes with noted laureates, researchers, book writers, African storytellers and former frat bros that turned into economics professors.
But alas, it all ends soon and I will have to use what I’ve learned in Madison to my advantage when I enter the workplace as a well-rounded, smart and diligent individual. I’ll soon have to clean up my Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn. I’ll soon have to wake up at 7 a.m. regularly and will have to endure morning traffic while listening to two obnoxious radio DJs talk about whose wife cooks the better meal. I’ll soon go from thinking, “I want to be blank when I grow up,” to “I should’ve been blank when I was younger.”
This might all seem depressing, but do not fear, reader. I embrace the future, because only the future can hold something that is better than the past. The memories I’ve made, the friends I’ve met, the $2 Long Island iced tea specials at The Plaza I’ve drunk, all created an emotional high that can be topped at anytime. My dwelling on the past won’t make the future less scary; au contraire it’ll make my yearning for things to not change stronger and ruin my views of becoming older.
So I’m ready world, give me all you have. I have two months left here and then I’ll become a famous A&R, or music journalist, or music agent or a sandwich artist at Subway. Whatever it is, I’m ready.
Graduating? Stressing? Contact Michael for counseling and expert advice by emailing mvoloshin@wisc.edu.
