I have a therapist. I’ve never felt completely confident admitting that fact to people, even my immediate family. Now, however, I think it’s important, particularly for university students, to know that you are not alone in fighting your mental health problems. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, one in every four Americans will experience a mental health condition at least once in their life. It’s also important to know that anyone can be effected by a mental health problem. Abraham Lincoln, Isaac Newton, Ernest Hemingway, Winston Churchill, Terry Bradshaw, Princess Diana, Sheryl Crow, Jim Carrey, Ashley Judd, J.K. Rowling, Heath Ledger and, most recently, Robin Williams all suffered from mental health problems. It is not simply a poor person’s problem or a drug user’s problem.
Sometimes it’s the ones among us who laugh the most that need the most help. That certainly was the case for me. I had this nagging suspicion that something might be wrong for a while. There would be weeks at a time where I just couldn’t get into the things that used to give me so much joy and fulfillment such as working out, video games or my favorite Netflix show. I’d lay in bed over half the day with no desire to get out, and I would eat one meal (and I use that term generously) a day. I made endless excuses—I would tell myself “You’re just tired” or “You’re growing up, so you don’t need childish distractions like video games anymore.” I simply wrote these experiences off as just a part of life. These were a complex set of masks and walls—dangerous illusions—I placed before myself for the purpose of protection. Or so I thought.
It took some poor decision making for me to wake up and look into the mirror and see myself becoming someone I didn’t want to be. This ultimately pushed me to seek help. But before I did that, while I was trying to solve my depression on my own, I only ended up hurting those closest to me. My failure to admit my own problems led to lost friendships, failed relationships and an incredible pain I wouldn’t wish on anyone.
When I revealed to people that I suffer from depression most were surprised but incredibly supportive. I thought people would think I was weak for asking for help because I wasn’t strong enough to handle my own problems, but that just wasn’t true. Most importantly, I couldn’t work toward fixing my depression until I admitted there was a problem. It suddenly became one less thing I needed to stress over because I no longer needed to hide it or pretend it didn’t exist.
As students we have enough to stress over already. The list is long—class, assignments, exams, studying, professors, TAs, labs, midterms, internships, deciding on a major, figuring out next semester’s classes—and these are just school related stresses. We’ve got friends, family, jobs, student organizations, finances, roommates, coaches, significant others (or the lack thereof) all piling on the conscience of an overworked, sleep-deprived student. Trust me when I tell you this shit can overwhelm and swallow you whole, but believe me when I say it gets better when you admit something might be off.
Now do not mistake this as some form of WebMD where you share some of the same feelings as me and think you have what I have. This is not a diagnosis and is not meant to scare you. It is, however, a hand I’m extending to let you know you don’t need to go it alone. You don’t even need to travel far—on the 7th floor of East Campus Mall, University Health Services (UHS) has an incredibly helpful mental health counseling and psychiatry department. Trust me, I’ve been there.
Being a student isn’t easy and it won’t get any easier if you don’t acknowledge your problems. Reach out for help because believe me, it does get better. Admitting something is wrong doesn’t mean you’re signing up for a laundry list of medications to take. Everyone’s different but sitting on your mental health problem hoping it will fix itself is not the answer.
Cullen is a senior majoring in history and political science. What is your take on mental illness on campus? Have you had to face a mental illness while being a student? We’d like to hear your view. Please send all feedback to opinion@dailycardinal.com.
