Members of the Madison Mallards baseball team of the Northwoods League have been neglecting most of their traditional offseason activities to spend copious hours playing the hit duck trivia mobile app called Trivia Quack.
The Mallards players, who are collegiate student athletes during the school year and semi-pro ballplayers during the summer, have been overwhelmingly consumed and mesmerized by the application’s spinning wheel that lands on one of six categories ranging from “bills” to “noises.”
“Me ’n’ the boys have been ‘quackin’ it up all winter long,” slugger infielder Pete “Bombski” Alonso said while his thumbs eagerly anticipated the next question about the specific type of oil that mallards excrete to stay dry. “I thought huntin’ ’em with my pops was fun but that just don’t compare to this business.”
Many of the Mallards players have been dropped from their NCAA Division I baseball programs due to missing too many crucial offseason workouts and practices while submerged in the game that tests users on all things duck. Pitcher Andrew Buckley has allowed his addiction to be so detrimental that the University of California-Berkeley has placed him on academic probation.
“Ropes, as I like to call him, better get his keester back in line,” Manager Zeke “ZZ Top” Zimmerman said through his long red beard. “If he ain’t get his grades up that boy gonna be riding the pine before you can say ‘chin music.’”
Northwoods League sources have reported that the Madison Mallards have requested to have their name officially changed to the Dane County Deer.
Bother Dylan on Twitter https://twitter.com/mr_manderson
