The Mixed Race Student Union hosted a panel of UW-Madison staff who explored the difficulties of interracial dating Wednesday.
“I am multiracial, so nobody knows where to put me anyway. Anybody I’ve dated is multiracial dating,” said Assistant Dean of Students Joshua Moon Johnson. “It is very interesting to think about, as a multiracial person, what society expects.”
Ashley Viager, First-Year seminar coordinator at the Center for First-Year Experience, identifies as multiracial Korean-American. Though she has dated white people, she said she did not get much feedback about the interracial aspect of her relationships until she started dating her current boyfriend, who is black.
“Most of my family on the Korean side are married to white men,” Viager said. “I think for them they would have always preferred I dated a white person compared to anyone else.”
Johnson said he had similar sentiments from the Korean side of his family.
“It was always expected that we would date white people even though we are half Asian,” Johnson said.
Though interracial marriage is legal in the United States and there has been an increase in multiracial people, the panelists said racism still persists. They pointed to a recent Cheerios commercial that received backlash for featuring a biracial couple.
“Since the arrival of white people in North America mixed race people have existed on this continent. That has not fixed racism,” Assistant Professor Brigitte Fielder said.
The panelists spoke to the challenges that come with interracial relationships, and gave advice for how they can be addressed.
“One of the things I learned relatively early was not to have very much patience with racism. Be careful not to set the bar too low for your expectations of how this ought to work out,” Fielder said.
Viager’s interracial relationship has caused tension with friends and family, but also helped her learn about her own racial identity and grow as a person, she said.
“As cheesy as it sounds, just remember why you love-slash-like each other,” Viager said. “Things can get really difficult and sometimes you just need to get back to that simple place, and remember why you are together.”
