Do you ever have one of those days where it feels as though all of your mistakes have caught up to you? You know those mornings when you wake up wishing you could take back that stupid thing you did last weekend, or thinking you should call your mom more often or contemplating an attempt to finish that calculus assignment that was due last week? Those mornings where it feels as though you wake up to a mountain of thoughts all disorderly jumbled inside your head? About two weeks ago, I had one of those mornings.
Now, if this were a face-to-face conversation, I probably would not be quite this honest. If, on said day, you asked me how I was, I would have smiled and replied “I’m good, just gotta get through the day,” because those small talk conversations are generally more about routine than research. However, because you are reading this by choice, I will speak fairly candidly with you. I’m sure you’ve had mornings, or even entire days, similar to this as well.
There are many ways to cope with this feeling. I prefer to eat a lot of ice cream and bang on the innocent keyboard of my laptop, because I’ve found that writing heals me in a way nothing else can. And via this medium, I am able to work through my issues without interrupting others. But this is exactly where I find the trouble: my silence and isolation.
It is human to hurt. We all feel pain, at times more intensely than others. But as I have gotten older, I have found that it is the times when I hurt the most that I notice the abundance of love around me. I live in an environment where I am surrounded by kind, caring people. However, every day is a new adventure, and sometimes life does not go according to plan.
It is so easy to get caught up in what is difficult and miss all of the warmth around you. When I was having a rough time, I shut down. I was immune to the loving smiles from my neighbors, I was less thoughtful, less careful and worst of all, less observant of all the good in my life. My friends told jokes, pulled pranks, watched movies and shared memories while I was too lost in my sadness over things I did not have the power to change.
My point is this: Time moves way too quickly to forget about what a privilege it is to live. Times get rough. People can be difficult. School can be hard. Money can be tight. All of this can be difficult to deal with. A system I have adopted is the 24 Hour Rule. If I am ever down about something, I give myself 24 hours to feel upset, and then I figure out how to fix it. Once you have given yourself the time to let your emotions consume you, it is imperative that you pick yourself back up. There is too much to be missed, and we have to be ready to accept both the good and the bad as it comes.
So, accept the love around you and allow it to help you through the rough spots. There is simply no point in barricading yourself from the world in the pursuit of protection from hurt or in an attempt at self-recovery. Feeling numb or alone is not better than feeling hurt, and ridding yourself of the numbness is much more difficult than healing a wound.
Negative feelings are not worth your time. If your best friend finds someone they like better, if the kids across the hall ignore your existence, if your ex-boyfriend treats you like hell, do not carry that with you. There is simply no time in this impermanent, fleeting life we are given to waste on people who do not make us feel loved.
Above all else, have perspective. While some things may seem like the end of the world, they may not even cross your mind in a year. So appreciate what is good, and do not dwell on what is bad.
Marisa is a freshman and is currently undecided on her major. What do you think of her perspective? Have you ever had one of those days that she describes? Do you find that, in those deeply troubling times, you escape into a cocoon of loneliness and despair? In your experience, is it beneficial to lean on those that care about you most as a mechanism to break out of your funk? What approach do you take when you are feeling down? We want to know what you think. Please send comments to opinion@dailycardinal.com
