Stressed bear continues to hibernate to avoid his problems

   Deep in the Redwood Forest in northern California lies a very peaceful, undisturbed bear. Reports indicate that Mike, a 200-pound black bear, is still deep in his winter hibernation, avoiding the many problems that life has to offer.
   According to Mike’s friends, this months-long nap is exactly what he needed. “He’s been really stressed out lately,” said his lifelong friend, Jerry, last fall. “Catching salmon all day is really starting to take a toll on him. And his first semester of bear college has placed a huge workload on him, too. I think taking a nap for a few thousand hours will do him a lot of good.”
    Mike, most likely dreaming of honey and attractive lady bears, has been able to avoid a wide array of wintertime problems such as trying to shed the Thanksgiving weight, figuring out what to get his family for Christmas and distracting himself from the fact that he, yet again, will not have a date for this Valentine’s Day.
Mike is also known to be quite the activist. “He’s always been very conscious of reminding people of their responsibility to prevent forest fires,” said Mike’s mother, pre-hibernation. “He really feels a sense of duty towards the Redwood Forest, where he’s lived his whole life. It’s almost a part of him, in a way. He really takes after his grandpa Smokey.”
The furry “Sleeping Beauty” still has a couple more months to spend huddled up, undisturbed before having to face reality again. However, there is not just busy work and stress waiting for Mike when he wakes up later this spring. This year, his family is reportedly hosting the annual Redwood Forest Fourth of July Bear-beque, which is sure to be an occasion involving copious amounts of salmon, honey and possibly illegal fireworks.