Michael Kowalski

A student demonstrates his undeniable coolness outside of Helen C. White.

Image Courtesy of Creative Commons - LawPrieR

THE BEET

Cold weather masks coolest students, makes social climbing inconvenient

By Michael Kowalski | Nov. 13, 2017

“It’s that time of year again, and I can’t stand it,” stated freshman Max Dudley.

THE BEET

Local stay-at-home mom dismantles NRA

By Michael Kowalski | Nov. 9, 2017

“After three years of diligent commenting on the Facebook, my efforts have finally produced the results I’ve been expecting,” stated Madison resident and stay-at-home mom, Barb Suzanna.

A global academic community has reached a consensus for alterations.

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Reform the Dictionary: mitigating disaster by language alteration

By Michael Kowalski | Sep. 18, 2017

Ideas are powerful. So powerful, in fact, that they have been the cause of countless ideological movements across the globe. From the rise of fascism in Germany and communism in Russia in the early 20th century, to rise of the alt-right led by figures like Breitbart’s Steve Bannon right here on Main Street in the United States. These movements, as evidenced by both the recent memories of the events in Charlottesville and the distant ones of what our forefathers invaded Europe to stop, can have life-altering consequences. Analyzing the effects that ideas — something that cannot even be seen nor physically touched — can have on society begs the question: where do ideas come from? The answer is simpler than one may think; ideas stem from thoughts, and thoughts from words. Words are just the invention of several cultures across the globe over time. Used in various combinations, they form hundreds of languages for humans to not only interact with one another, but with themselves.

Zsolt Nyulaszi

THE BEET

Hordes of optimistic pre-med freshmen strain expectations, consistently disappoint everyone

By Michael Kowalski | Sep. 6, 2017

The number of students choosing the pre-med track has skyrocketed this September thanks to ball-busting pressure from parents and the false, fantasized day in a doctor’s life portrayed by Grey’s Anatomy (which was originally an anatomical textbook). However, this influx is misleading; the number of doctors who attended UW-Madison for their undergraduate education has little to no correlation to the number of students who are currently claiming they will be doctors.

Cold weather masks coolest students, makes social climbing inconvenient

Local stay-at-home mom dismantles NRA

Reform the Dictionary: mitigating disaster by language alteration

Hordes of optimistic pre-med freshmen strain expectations, consistently disappoint everyone

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